La Jolla resident and Pacific Beach restaurateur Steve Bettles, 74, died peacefully Sunday, Feb. 16 of a rare neurological disease, Progressive Supranuclear Palsy (PSP). Steve’s wife, Kathy, and his sons, Tommy and Joe, were at his side.

Up to the end, Steve, after having lived many years with PSP, urged those around him to “stop worrying.” His family said he passed as he had wanted, in his beautiful La Jolla home embraced by love and laughter from his adoring family.

Steve lived his whole life surrounded by family. Born in 1950 in La Jolla as the third oldest of seven children of Bill and Jean Bettles, Steve was always fond of his warm, if somewhat rowdy childhood. Steve would proudly tell you that his success as a restaurant owner began as a dishwasher at Chuck’s Steakhouse in a development his father built on Prospect Street. He worked up to be the manager at Scotch & Sirloin in Westwood, before convincing a group of investors to back him in his restaurant at only 23 years old.

Bettles set off for San Antonio, where he opened a steakhouse in 1973, The Quarterdeck, which was an overnight success. Beyond finding commercial success in Texas, Steve was lucky enough to find his soul mate, Kathy, who applied for a hostess position and was hired on the spot. The couple fell in love and later moved back to San Diego in 1979 and were married in his mother’s house in the Shores in 1982. The young couple flipped houses while they worked their way through college, with Steve earning a bachelor’s in political science from San Diego State.

Not long after their son Tommy was born in 1984, Steve came back to the restaurant business. The young parents moved into a small one-bedroom apartment next to their new restaurant, Lamont Street Grill, serving California cuisine in a cozy converted house. Having children and running a restaurant as new parents worked for a period, but after their second son Joe, was born and school schedules started, they decided to try a new concept that might allow them to have evenings free to spend time with their kids.

In 1991, the young parents scouted a laid-back cafe in a prime location next to Crystal Pier. Undeterred by the biker bars next door, Kathy in her shoulder pads and Steve in his Polo and Ray Bans went to work building Kono’s Cafe. The restaurant remains a local landmark, continuing to serve “fast and delicious meals, on the edge of a continent, for a good price,” as Steve would say.

Steve would spend nearly every day of the next 34 years going to Kono’s. It was his happy place. Even when he was unable to walk from PSP, his loyal and loving employees would wheel him inside. Kono’s filled him with pride to the very end. That said, he was always quick to give the credit for its success to his long-time manager, Martin Medina, and the outstanding crew of dedicated employees that became a second family for Steve and Kathy.

Family was serious business for Steve, who adored his brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews, his two sons, their loving partners Lydia and Andreas, and his wife and “best friend,” Kathy. To say Steve loved coaching Tommy in basketball or Joe performing on stage does not begin to capture the joy he experienced sitting on the sidelines or in the orchestra seats, hands gripping the armrests. When Tommy’s children Oliver and Ellie began playing sports and performing, he got to experience this joy all over again.

“Steve was always very proud that he helped start the Pacific Beach business improvement district,” said son Joe Bettles. “Also, he coached at Mission Bay Youth Sports: baseball, soccer, and basketball.

Steve’s loving spirit was shared with so many in his community. From helping start the business improvement district in PB, the countless ways he supported his employees, mentoring kids on personal management in Boy Scouts, hosting (and overdoing) parties, to offering a friendly caring ear and shoulder for the many thousands of customers he greeted daily at Kono’s, Steve showed what it meant to “help other people at all times.” Kono’s was a reflection of Steve’s spirit – joyous, unpretentious, and a place where everyone felt welcomed and embraced.

While his disease took so much from Steve, he never once pitied himself and it never dimmed his heart. Nurses would look with surprise, as they checked his pulse to see that his heart beat strongly up until the day he died. His heart was an endless well from which he gave love freely and openly without any concern for what he would receive in return.

Steve’s family, employees, friends, customers, and the many people he touched along the way will carry this love with them. He was right about so many things, but he got one thing wrong; Kono’s was not his greatest legacy, it was the love he gave his family and his community – who dearly loved him back – that will live on. We are going to miss the hell out of you, Steve.

A tribute for Steve Bettles was held on Feb. 23 at the Catamaran Hotel in Pacific Beach.