By Lucia Viti

The $64,000 question for Bethel Nathan can only be: “How does a Wall Street executive become an award-winning wedding officiant?”

Nathan’s answer is simple.

“My life from Wall Street to weddings is a fun, crazy, un-straight line that began as the sexy job you’re supposed to want, to celebrating life, love and all that is meaningful,” the North Park resident said. “My business education steered me on a traditional corporate path that I loved, but officiating weddings fuels my passion for making a difference in people’s lives.”

Touting an undergraduate degree in political science and Japanese studies from the University of California at Berkeley and an MBA in international business from Thunderbird School of Global Management, Nathan spent nine years working for global investment banks in New York, Japan and London. She worked with trading institutional equity derivatives before designing and facilitating worldwide training programs.

Nathan’s corporate rise remained undaunted until the morning of Sept. 11, 2001. Located seven blocks from the World Trade Center, the former California resident found herself walking home shrouded in ash and debris after witnessing the fall of the North Tower. During the 10-mile trek to the Upper Westside, Nathan said she realized that she was being held captive by Wall Street’s lure.

“The handcuffs were gold and beautiful,” she said. “But they were still handcuffs. 9/11 solidified my desire to leave. I walked away within months at age 33 never wondering ‘what if?’ because I had already proven my success.”

Nathan returned to North Park and worked as chief operations officer for her family’s 20-year-old promotional products company. Six years later, convinced that she served her purpose applying her corporate world experience to benefit her parents’ small business, Nathan searched in earnest for her passion.

“I left sexy, lucrative Wall Street because it wasn’t my passion, so I knew that I couldn’t continue working with my parents,” she said. “I didn’t have the flexibility not to work so I questioned, ‘What would I do if I didn’t have to earn a living?’ The answer was easy, run a philanthropy or marry people.”

Nathan launched Ceremonies by Bethel in 2009 with immediate success. The “off-chance” idea began when her brother and his fiancée asked her to officiate their upcoming nuptials. The couple requested an interfaith, non-religious ceremony that would celebrate their love. Nathan’s experience as a public speaker propelled her into agreement. And in true Bethel fashion, she researched religious, non-religious, traditional and non-traditional ceremonies while assigning homework to the couple.

“I initiated assignments that I still use today,” she explained. “Their homework is a two-part process that consists of questions — answered separately — to pull in their voices as couples share how the relationship differs between them from the beginning of their relationship, to what it is, and what lies in their future. The exercises remind couples why they’re getting married which can easily get lost when planning the party. Part two details vows, rings, readings, creative visuals and all components that personalize the ceremony. I write services based on what speaks to each couple and what they’re willing to share.”

Nathan’s new venture proved to be a smash hit. Requests poured in and Nathan knew she had found her niche. To date, Nathan has officiated 665 weddings. Winning rave awards from WeddingWire and The Knot, the industries’ leading online and hard copy magazines, led Nathan in 2013 to create an offspring business venture, Asked to Officiate, with her husband Jason. The duo create and sell products and services nationwide to couples who seek a friend or family member to marry them.

“There are a spectrum of couples looking for something different because the norm doesn’t speak to them,” Nathan noted. “I celebrate all that couples share in front of those who matter most with a genuine and personal ceremony.”

Nathan offers a variety of ceremonies including Ring Warmings, Stone Blessings, Rose, Breaking of the Glass, Box with Wine and Love Letters.

““Every ceremony is different because every couple is different,” she said. “No matter how off-beat, couples can assimilate their personality into any tradition to give it a personal and cool meaning.”

While Ceremonies by Bethel remains a smashing success, Nathan finds time for philanthropy and community service.

“I’ve participated in the Susan G. Komen, Three-Day Breast Cancer Walk, including serving on its board of directors and San Diego’s Race for the Cure, doing all that I can,” she concluded. “I’m also a proud member of the San Diego’s Women’s Foundation, a group of women who work together as a collective philanthropy — to make a bigger impact together than I could ever make by myself.”

Handfasting Ceremony

A Celtic tradition adopted and adapted for modern weddings. Couples tie a knot of rope, ribbons, or a hybrid of both. Vows or promises — traditional and those written by the couples — are spoken as ribbons are wrapped around their joined arms. Couples choose colors based on personal preference.

Salt Covenant

Historically agreements were sealed by a salt covenant — pinches of salt placed into a bottle. Agreements could only be broken when salt grains were removed by each individual. Due to such impossibility, promises become eternal, enduring and forever abiding. “As these grains of salt are forever joined together, couples are forever joined as partners in life,” Nathan explained.

Sand Ceremony

Popular in California, Florida and Hawaii, couples blend two colors of sand. “Just as these grains of sand can never be separated and poured again into the individual containers, so will the marriage be,” Nathan said. Children blending into one family can also pour colored sand on top of the couple’s layer or the family pours the sand together. The sand is kept as a forever keepsake and often displayed like a framed wedding photograph.

Tasting the Four Elements

Couples taste four elements during this African-American wedding tradition. Lemon represents the sour; vinegar the bitter; cayenne pepper the hot; and honey the sweet and delicious; symbolic to love for better or worse, for richer or poorer, and in sickness and health. Couples can substitute chocolate; pure cacao as the raw and bitter; key lime white chocolate for the harsh and sour; spicy Mayan chocolate for the fiery and exciting; and honeycomb chocolate for the sweet and delicious. “Such are the elements of life, love, and now marriage,” said Nathan. “Inevitably, there will be sour and bitter. But what’s life without the crazy and spontaneous to make it fun? We wrap end this ritual with the words, ‘As I expect many of us have learned, with the right partner at our side, not only can we handle all of the tastes that life brings our way, but it makes life better than we ever even imagined it could be!’”

—Contact Lucia Viti at [email protected].